Book review by Nancy
Snipper
We all do it:
complain. Some of the things we complain about are out of our control. We
complain about the weather, getting older, parking tickets, landlords, potholes
and traffic. We even complain about our in-laws, a difficult co-worker, and
yes, our spouses. Most of us vet; we just don’t stop and think about turning
our complaints into a strategy whose outcome will produce a positive result. Amy
Fish, a complaint expert, has recently written an 86-page book, titled, “The
Art of Complaining Effectively.” This how-to-book enables us to move our
complaints out of the negative zone - making them work in our favour for optimum
results. The books are now being snapped off the shelves.
“Essentially, the book
offers five key tips – all starting with the letter “C” for complaining. To
sweeten the task, there’s a cookie recipe at the end of the book,” laughs
Fish. It’s full of humour, with many funny
personal anecdotes wherein Fish herself even finds it hard to practice what she
preaches. She certainly can laugh at herself, and you realize this when your
read the book. But Fish, takes complaining to heart.
First off, she tells
us to keep calm by letting a little time pass before raising your complaint. “If
you call in and you feel upset, you’re less likely to get the problem resolved.
Secondly, you need to be concise: be
clear in your head what exactly you’re complaining about. Cross out the ones
that aren’t that important. Next, you need to choose the desired result you
want – what you are aiming for before you engage in the complaint.”
Here Fish revealed
that so many people just get angry, but don’t give ideas as to how to make
things right.
“Make a suggestion as
to how to fix the specific problem. For example, if you get a bad haircut, let
them know politely, and let them know what it will take to make you happy. For
example, you can ask for a refund, a free product or a gift certificate.”
Fish’s complaint book
came about from both her personal and professional life experiences. She’s been
an ombudsman for several Health Care Centres, including Maimonides, Jewish Elder
Care and Miriam Home.
She did this for five
years, and is presently Director of Operations and Quality for Maimonides and
Jewish Elder Care.
Needless to say, Fish
has met her fair share of complaints and very often they are expressed during
her public speaking engagements.
“Many people will ask
me for advice about the personal problems they are having at work or with a
family member or friend. She began to
see that another book was needed to address these problems that involve
personal contexts. So, she’s working on writing another book. It offers 29 tips
that have a trial and error modus operandi application. In fact, the book deals
with how to effectively complain to people who are rather “difficult”. We all
know about those types. This second complaint book will be out next spring.
Fish believes in the
adage: try, try, try again: but advises us to “Use different strategies if the
first or second one doesn’t work”.
She has a Masters Degree
in Health Administration from the University
of Toronto, and did her undergraduate
degree in psychology at Brandeis University in Boston.
She’s also worked at
the American Academy
of Neurology, in St. Paul, Minnesota. He she specialized in quality improvement
which centres on mistake prevention.
Married with three
kids aged 14, 12 and 8, Fish has ample opportunities to test old and new
strategies. “Every day I discover new ways to keep my kids on their game.”
If you read Amy’s
weekly highly humorous blog, you’ll discover just how much she has to fend off
complaints about herself. After all, it’s not a prefect world, and Fish is the
first to own up to her imperfections.
“The Art of
Complaining Effectively” is available at Bibliophile, 5519
Queen Mary Rd.; Espace Tricot, 6050 Monkland Ave.; the Mortimer
Snodgrass gift store, 56 Notre
Dame St. W.; the gift shops of the Jewish
Eldercare Centre, 5725 Victoria Ave .and the Maimonides Geriatric Centre, 5795
Caldwell Ave.